NTR as Software developer ..dana Veera sura karna

SIDE EFFECTS of working in the IT sector !!!

☼ ☼ SIDE EFFECTS of working in the IT sector !!! ☼ ☼




These are real life anecdotes shared by IT workers.



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Vivek



I once left home to go to the market wearing my Infosys ID card and did not realize till my friend asked me why I was wearing it !!!!



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Bhavani



Once I was flashing my ID card instead of unlocking the house door with keys.



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Ashok



Few days back I slept at 12:00 in the night and woke up in the morning at 7:00 and suddenly thought that I haven't completed 8 hours and laughed at myself when I realized that I am at home.



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Jyotsna



Just after our training completion in Mysore and posting to Pune, me and my friends went out for dinner in one of the best restaurants. .



And as I finished.. I started walking towards the wash basin with Plates in my hand..



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Abhijeet



Once I was on call with my father and mom was not around.



I went on to ask, "Why is she not attending the status call?"



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Anup



I don't login to orkut, yahoo, gmail, youtube, etc..



at my personal internet connection at home...



thinking it will be blocked any way.



Till I realize - I am at home.



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Rohit



Yeah sometimes it do happens with me also.



keeping hands in front of tap for waiting water to drop by itself is very frequent with me.



I just forget that we have to turn on and off the tap....



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Nidhi



Once after talking to one of my friends



I ended the conversation saying,



" Ok bye...in case of any issues will call u back"



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Nisha



Sometimes when I mistakenly delete a message from my mobile, I hope for a second, maybe it’s in the recycle bin



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Nisha



I gave my office mail id and password to access Gmail and wondered when they became invalid???



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Sandeep



Once I went to a pharmacy n asked for a tab....



pharmacist asked whether I want 250mg or 500mg.....



I replied 256mg....thank god he didn't notice.



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Ashwin



Me getting a thought of doing an Alt+Tab while switching from a news channel to the DVD while watching TV.



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Vidyarthi



And I - after a forty hour marathon in Bhubaneshwar with Powerbuilder, decided to take a break and went to a movie. In the middle of the movie, when I wanted to check the time, I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the theatre screen!

cwg jokes

Delhi badnaam hui CWG tere liye! Sadkein bhi jam hui, CWG tere liye




1) BREAKING NEWS: Suresh Kamadi just tried to hang himself in the CWG stadium. But the ceiling collapsed



2) The truth behind bulk sms banning is to stop kalmadi jokes and not Ayodhya



3) Look at the brighter side; the more countries pull out, the higher India is ranked in the final medal’s tally.



4) Terrorists set to skip CWG 2010 citing unlivable conditions and fear for their safety.



5) Q: How many contractors are required to change a light bulb in Delhi CWG stadium?

A: 1 Million. (1 to change bulb and rest 999,999 to hold the ceiling)



6) Whats common between CWG committee and students???

Ans: both start their preparations at the 11th hour.....



7) Prince Charles is actively convincing the Queen to visit dengue hit Delhi, this may be his last chance to become the king!



8) Thanks to Guernsey and Jersey for threatening to pull out of games! We now know these countries existed!



9) Ek waqt aisa aayega, kalmadi bhi sharmayega



10) A collapse a day keeps the athletes away



11) Ba ba Kalmadi, have you any shame. No sir, No sir, we are having a Common Loot Game. Crores for my partner, crores for the dame, crores for me too, for spoiling India's name!



12) AMAZING BUT TRUE: If you re-arrange the letters "Sir U made lakhs" you get "SURESH KALMADI



13) next edition of CWG will be called KWG, Kalmadi Wealth Games



14) Photo for the last one..!

Common wealth games ..delhi

balayya jokes ..

Balakrishna went to cloth market







Balaya: Manchi cloth chupinchandi..






Salesman: plain lo chupincha mantara….






Balaya: Nee yabba plane lo kadu ra ikkade chupinchu…


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Ntr: Babay which is the biggest animal, Ant or Elephant…?






Balaya: First tell the date of birth of those animals. Then I will tell


the answer…..


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Interviewer : Congrats you r selected. U r 1 ^st year salary is Rs19000


and next year it will be 26000.






Balaya: Thank you sir. I will join next year…..


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Aghora tells to Balaya abt Magadheera….






Aghora: Vadu MANDAY agni golam la kanipistadu…






Balaya: Avuna Mari vadu TUESDAY kanapdite ela gurthu pattali ghora….?






Aghora: Nuvvu maaravra Baaliga


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After eating fish Balaya did not drink water why…?






Because






He feared that fish will start swimming in his stomach….


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Interviewer: Me birth place ekkda…?






Balaya: Tiruvananthapuram….






Interviewer: Tell me the spelling…?






Balaya: Indaka joke chesa, nenu GOA lo puttanu…


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Ntr: Babay ratri mobile charging petti padukoku..






Balaya : Endukura …?






Ntr : Battery blast avutundanta…






Balaya : Telusura bacha anduke nenu Battry teesi charging Pettanu…


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One day Balaya and Akber went 2 masjid..






Akber : Allah hoo Akber…






Balaya : Allah hoo Balaya


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Ntr: Adenti Babai Tablet sides cut chesi vesukuntunnavu…?






Balaya: Side effects rakunda untayani..


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Ntr : Rakhi Bagundi evaru kattaru babai…?






Balaya: na Lovertho nene kattiinchukunna….


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Balaya waiting at bus stop, one girl came in scooty & asked do you want


Lift…?






Balaya: NO thanks my house in ground floor..


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Balaya: Express train eppudu vastundi..?






T.c: 9ki






Balaya: Local train eppudu vastundi…?






Tc.: 1ki






Balaya: Goods eppudu vastundi…?






T.c: Nuv ekkadaki povali…?






Balaya: Track dati avatalaki povali…

Mahindra satyam walkin for Bsc,Bca

Limitation ... is what we set

Here's a story about George Dantzig - the famed mathematician, whose contributions to Operations Research and systems engineering have made him immortal.








As a college student, George studied very hard often late into the night. So late, that he overslept one morning, arriving 20 minutes late for Prof. Neyman's class.



He quickly copied the two math's problems on the board, assuming they were the homework assignment. It took him several hours to work through the two problems, but finally he had a breakthrough and dropped the homework on Prof. Neyman's desk the next day.



Six weeks later, on a Sunday morning, his excited professor awakened George at 6 a.m.



Since George was late for class, he hadn't heard the professor announce that the two unsolvable equations on the board were mathematical mind-teasers that even Einstein hadn't been able to answer!



But George Dantzig, working without any thoughts of limitation, had solved not one, but two problems that had stumped mathematicians for thousands of years.



He simply said, "George solved the problems because he didn't know he couldn't ."

balayya sms jokes -3

Director : U have 2 jump in 2 swimming pool 4m 100th floor
Balayya : i dont know swimming
Director : Dont worry there is not water in it
Balayya : Aithe ...keka puttishaaa

balayya sms joke 2

Jnr Ntr :  Water nunchi current enduku testharu ?

Balayya babai : cheta na kodaka ala tiyakapothe snanam chesetaudu shock kodtadi kadarra

Jnr Ntr : Nuvu keka babai

enjoy more balayya jokes @

Balayya Jokes

onsite requirements for mahindra satyam

UK








· SAP - ABAP, FICO, PP, QM, MM, APO, WM , XI (6 yrs – 10 yrs)



· Program/Project Managers ( SAP) (8 yrs – 14 yrs)







For UK opportunities, mail the suitable profiles mentioning the “Skills/yrs of experience”



in the subject line to Santosh_Basarkar@mahindrasatyam.com







US







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· SQL, COBOL, IBM iSeries/AS400 (exp. – 3yrs to 7 yrs)



· CGI Perl Development, Shell Scripting, UNIX, DHTML, XM (exp. - 5 yrs)



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· C#, Agile(Scrum), WPF, WCS,LINQ (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Cognos Developer, Data Manager (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Fatwire, J2EE (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Documentum, Livelink (exp. - 5 yrs)



· MES, Industrial Automation, MES-ERP Integrations (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Lombardi (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Webmethods Developer (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Websphere Server (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Sharepoint Admin (exp. - 5 yrs)



· Documentum, Livelink (exp. - 5 yrs)







For US opportunities, please do mail the relevant suitable profiles mentioning the “Skills/Yrs of experience” in the subject line to Rajasekhar_Goud@mahindrasatyam.com.

Referal mail id : krishna_sumanth@satyam.com