Showing posts with label sardar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sardar. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Intelligent Sardar


A Sardarji and his wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road.

When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350.. The Sardarji explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350. When the clerk tells him $350 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appears, listens to the Sardarji, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use...

But we didn't use them', the Sardarji complains.

Well, they are here, and you could have,' explains the Manager. He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. 'The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here,' the Manager says.

But we didn't go to any of those shows,' sardarji complains again.

'Well, we have them, and you could have', the Manager replies. No matter what facility the Manager mentions, the sardarji replies 'But we didn't use it'. The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the Sardarji finally gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the Manager.

The Manager is surprised when the looks at the check.
'But sir,' he says, 'this check is only made out for $100.' 'That's right,' says the sardarji,

'I charged you $250 for sleeping with my wife.'

'But I didn't!' exclaims the Manager.

'Well,' the Sardarji replies, 'she was here, and you could have.'

Naughty SMS

Wife reads a book and tells her husband: A bull fucks 3000 times a year. U don't do quarter of that!
Husband says: Does d book say that d bull fucks d same cow?
************ ********* ********* ********* ******
Gang of sardars broke a bank,
But instead of cash they found glasses of lassi.
Happily they drank lassi n left.
Next day's headlines:
"SPERM BANK LOOTED".
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *
Banta NE Suhag raat ko biwi se pucha: Kya tum VIRGIN ho?
Biwi: Ji, magar PEECHE se! Aur Tum?
Banta: Main bhi, magar aage se
************ ********* ********* ********* ******
VIRGIN AIRLINE's ad :

"TRY US"...
We are more experienced than our name suggests...! !"

Friday, July 4, 2008

Sardar jokes


Where were you born ?
sardar : Punjab.
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.

Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
petrol se start hoti hai.

Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why
are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler

Interviewer : When is your birthday.
Sardar : 13th Oct.
Interviewer : which year ?
sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.

Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any
one before you die?
Patient : Yes. A good doctor.

On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our
engagement
day will you give me a ring.
Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the
computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Sardar jokes

American told sardar : Hamare desh me 90% shaadi e-mail se hoti hai.
Sardar : Kya bath hai. Hamari desh me 100% female se hoti hai.


Where were you born ?
sardar : Punjab.
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.



Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara
3.gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.



Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler

Interviewer : When is your birthday.
Sardar : 13th Oct.
Interviewer : which year ?
sardar : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Increasing petrol sales

A petrol station owner in Ludhiana was trying to increase his sales. So, he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.'

Soon a Sardar pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex. the Sardar guessed 8, and the proprietor said, 'You were close. The number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time.'

A week later, the Sardar, along with his friend ,a Gujju, pulled in for another fill-up. Again he asked for his free sex. The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number. the Sardar guessed 2 this time. The proprietor said, 'Sorry, it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time.'

As they were driving away, the Gujju said to the Sardar, 'I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex.'
he Sardar replied, 'No it ain't, . It's not rigged at all. My wife won twice last week.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Bee

A man comes running to the doctor shouting and
Screaming in pain " Please doctor, you've got to help me. I've been stung by a bee."

DOCTOR: " Don't worry; I'll put some cream on it."

MAN: " You will never find that bee. It must be miles away by now."

DOCTOR: " No, you don't understand! I'll put some
Cream on the place you were stung."

MAN: " Oh! It happened in the garden where I was
Sitting under a tree."'

DOCTOR (in anger): " No, no, you IDIOT! I mean on which part of your body did that bee sting."

MAN (still screaming in pain): " On my finger! The bee stung me on my finger and it really hurts."

DOCTOR (banging his fist, abusing and shouting):
" Which one?"

MAN (innocently): " How am I to know? All bees look the same to me."