Showing posts with label Women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Women. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Expert Advices for Safety of Women




1) What should a woman do if she finds herself alone in the company of a strange

male as she prepares to enter a lift in a high-rise apartment late at night?



Experts Say: Enter the lift. If you need to reach the 13th floor, press

all the buttons up to your destination. No one will dare attack you in a lift that stops on every floor.





2) What to do if a stranger tries to attack you when you are alone in your

house, run into the kitchen.



Experts Say: You alone know where the chili powder and turmeric are kept.

And where the knives and plates are. All these can be turned into deadly

weapons. If nothing else, start throwing plates and utensils all over.

Let them break. Scream. Remember that noise is the greatest enemy of a

molester. He does not want to be caught.



3} Taking an Auto or Taxi at Night.



Experts Say: Before getting into an auto at night, note down its registration

number. Then use the mobile to call your family or friend and pass on the

details to them in the language the driver understands .Even if no one

answers your call, pretend you are in a conversation. The driver now knows

someone has his details and he will be in serious trouble if anything goes

wrong. He is now bound to take you home safe and sound. A potential attacker

is now your de facto protector!



4} What if the driver turns into a street he is not supposed to - and you

feel you are entering a danger zone?



Experts Say: Use the handle of your purse or your stole (dupatta) to wrap

around his neck and pull him back. Within seconds, he will feel choked

and helpless. In case you donĂ¢€™t have a purse or stole just pull him back

by his collar. The top button of his shirt would then do the same trick.



5} If you are stalked at night.



Expert Say: enter a shop or a house and explain your predicament.

If it is night and shops are not open, go inside an ATM box. ATM centers

always have security guards. They are also monitored by close circuit television.

Fearing identification, no one will dare attack you.



After all, being mentally alert is the greatest weapon you can ever have ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

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Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Calories burnt in sex

CALORIES BURNED DURING SEX!





REMOVING HER CLOTHES:



With her consent 12 Calories


Without her consent 2,187 Calories







OPENING HER BRA:



With both hands 8 Calories


With one hand 12 Calories


With your teeth 485 Calories







PUTTING ON A CONDOM:



With an erection 6 Calories


Without an erection 3,315 Calories







POSITIONS:



Missionary 12 Calories


69 lying down 78 Calories



69 standing up 812 Calories


Wheelbarrow 216 Calories


Doggy Style 326 Calories


Italian chandelier 2,912 Calories







ORGASMS:



Real 112 Calories


Fake 1,315 Calories







POST ORGASM:



Lying in bed hugging 18 Calories


Getting up immediately 36 Calories


Explaining why you got out of bed immediately 816
Calories








GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:



If you are:




20-29 years 36 Calories


30-39 years 80 Calories


40-49 years 124 Calories


50-59 years 1,972 Calories


60-69 years 7,916 Calories


70 and over Results are still pending







DRESSING AFTERWARDS:



Calmly.. 32 Calories


In a hurry 98 Calories


With her father knocking at the door 5,218 Calories


With your wife knocking at the door 13,521 Calories






Results may vary!

Thursday, April 17, 2008

women cry ..watch her eyes



A little boy asked his mother, 'Why are you crying?' 'Because I'm a woman,' she told him.

'I don't understand,' he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, 'And you never will.'

Later the little boy asked his father, 'Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?'

'All women cry for no reason,' was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry..

Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, 'God, why do women cry so easily?'

God said

'When I made the woman she had to be special.

I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.'

'You see my son,' said God, 'the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides.'

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Weight loss

baba Ramdeve said,
{sabha mein} ketane logo ne apana wait kam kiya hai.

one women- Baba maine, do din me 10 kg loose kiya.

Baba-kaise, sabako bataoo.

Women- main pregnent thee dilevery ho gayee

ha......ha.............ha................ :-)

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Men Vs Women

Men:

1. All men are extremely busy.


2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women.

3. Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them.

4. Although they don't really care for them, they always have one
Around.

5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their
Luck with others.

6. Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off If the women leaves them.

7. Although the women leaves them they still don't learn from their
Mistakes and still try their luck with others.


Women:


1. the most important thing for a woman is financial security.

2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive
Clothes.

3. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something To wear.

4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress
Beautifully.

5. Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just "An old rag".

6. Although their clothes are always "just an old rag", they still

Expect you to compliment them.

7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don't Believe you