Showing posts with label boss.monkey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boss.monkey. Show all posts

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Smart child



A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees
had phoned in sick one day.

Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialled the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
"Hello?"
"Is your daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the
boss asked, "Is your Mummy there?"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked,
"May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy", whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Mummy and Daddy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search
team just landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle "ME."

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Let Boss Speak --- By mala

A Junior Software engineer, a Senior Software engineer and their Project
Manager are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they
come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The
ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three,
I will allow one wish each". So the eager Junior Software engineer
shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast
boat and have no worries. "Pfufffff" and he was gone. Now the Senior
Software engineer could not keep quiet and shouted " I want to be in
Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails. "Pfufffff"
and he was also gone.
The Project Manager calmly said," I want these two idiots back in the
office after lunch at 1.30pm"
Moral of the story is:
"Always allow the boss to speak first"

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Pet shop

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a monkey.

The shop owner points to 3 identical looking monkeys on a perch and says the monkey on the left cost $ 500.00,

Why does that one cost so much? asked the shopper.

The owner says well the monkey knows how to use a computer.

The man then asks about the next monkey and was told that this one cost $1000.00 because it can do everything the other monkey can do plus he knows the Unix operating system.

Naturally the increasingly startled man asks about the third monkey to be told that it costs $ 2000.00 .

Needles to say this begs the question.

What can it do?

To which the owner replies:

"To be honest I have never seen him do a thing but the other two call him BOSS"