almost married

Two old high school buddies get together at their class reunion. Having not seen each other for many years, the first guy asks, 'How have things been going?'

The second guy, speaking very slowly replied, 'I w..a..s a..l..m..o..s..t m..a..r..r..i..e..d.'

The first guy says in amazement, 'Hey, you don't stutter any more, that's great.'

The second guy replies, 'Y..e..s, I w..e..n..t t..o a d..o..c..t..o..r a..n..d h..e t..o..l..d m..e t..h..a..t i..f I s..p..e..a..k s..l..o..w..l..y I w..i..l..l n..o..t s..t..u..t..t..e..r.'

The first guy congratulates him and then asks, 'What did you mean by you were almost married?'

'W..e..l..l, m..y f..i..a..n..c..e..e a..n..d I w..e..r..e s..i..t..t..i..n..g o..n h..e..r p..o..r..c..h a..n..d t..h..e d..o..g s..t..a..r..t..e..d s..c..r..a..t..c..h..i..n..g h..i..s b..a..c..k, a..n..d s..o I t..o..l..d h..e..r t..h..a..t a..f..t..e..r w..e a..r..e m..a..r..r..i..e..d, s..h..e c..a..n d..o t..h..a..t f..o..r m..e. A..n..d t..h..e..n s..h..e s..l..a..p..p..e..d m..e a..n..d t..h..r..e..w t..h..e .r..i..n..g o..n t..h..e g..r..o..u..n..d.'

'Why would she do that? Wasn't she a romantic type?' asks the first guy.

'W..e..l..l, s..h..e w..a..s, b..u..t I s..p..e..a..k s..o s..l..o..w..l..y t..h..a..t, b..y t..h..e t..i..m..e s..h..e l..o..o..k..e..d a..t t..h..e d..o..g, h..e w..a..s l..i..c..k..i..n..g h..i..s b..a..l..l..s.'